Thursday 9 October 2014

J'habite à Beauvais


Well hello there lovely readers!

I wish I had started this sooner – I may only have been in France for a week but I don’t even know where to begin!!

Ok firstly we’ll start with a reminder. As I mentioned in a previous post, I applied to be an English Language Assistant (ELA) with the British Council in France, and I was, to my surprise, accepted. As a matter of interest, that previous post says I'll be living in Amiens, but actually although I'm working for the Academie d'Amiens, my particular school is in Beauvais - a few miles away. I was a little (read: incredibly) nervous about the move because my French is très, très limiteé - I studied it at High School but I've not used or thought about it since. Nevertheless, what idiot turns down a paid, 7 month job abroad? Not me! So I got the sand out my vagina, packed my case, and here I am.*

*Sorry (read: not sorry) if this language is a bit crass for you, I, however, believe that as 50% of the population is in possession of said vagina, it’s ridiculous that its thought of as a ‘bad’ word and I will probably use it as freely and shamelessly as I would use the word ‘tumour’, which, by the way, is present in FAR less than 50% of the population.

So aye, as I wis sayin’, I’m in France working in an upper-secondary school (lycée, 15-18yr olds), and I’m loving the job. This first week has been mostly ‘observing’ – I come into the classes, I introduce myself and talk about me for a few minutes, and then the students ask me questions about myself, my family, Scotland, etc. Sometimes this lasts 20 minutes, sometimes it takes the full hour, but it’s generally always interesting. So far, the pattern in most classes has been that the questions start off as expected – “What is your name? Where are you from? Is it cold in Scotland?” – and then progressively get stranger – “Have you ever touched a koala? Have you ever seen a dwarf?”

At first I thought, “Man, big kids are as weird as little kids! Little kids ask weird-ass questions too!” But then I thought about it a bit more and the suggestion occurred to me that maybe, just maybe, the common denominator is me? But I doubt it because I’m generally a very sensible and serious person and it’s unlikely any of my ramblings would have given rise to such unusual and imaginative talk. 

;)

So the job is cool. Next week I meet my classes properly, and we’ll be doing a bit of getting to know each other and a few ice breaker games, and then after the October holidays we’ll be doing slightly more structured classes with a focus on oral comprehension and oral expression.

Yes, that’s right folks, I’m getting paid to CHAT WITH PEOPLE. Get in!

The French aspect of France is, however, a little harder. I think all the teachers quite quickly realised my French abilities are practically non-existent, which is fine in my department (English) but a little harder when it comes to the other teachers and school staff, who don’t speak English. I HATE HATE HATE speaking in English outside the classes, too. I WISH WITH ALL MY BONES I could communicate in French, but it’s just not happening. Even if I can find the words in my head, as soon as I open my mouth they fall out and disappear. I’ve just about got to grips with ‘bonjour,’ ‘bonsoir’ and ‘merci’ but other than that, I don’t think a single more complicated word has left my lips. This is despite me picking up such sophisticated French vocabulary as ‘mouchoirs’ (tissues), ‘cintres’ (coathangers), and 'bonhomme baton' (stick man). See, I told you all my chat was serious and on-topic.

La cathedrale. I'm not in any way religious, but when you stand under this building and think about the lives of all the people who built it, who have worked or prayed in it, who have lived in its' shadow, walked past it, or in any way played a part in it's existence, it's hard not to suddenly feel like your problems are completely normal, like many a person  has been in your shoes before. It's not that your worries are negated in any way, just that they're a part of human existence that everyone experiences, which gives you some perspective, I suppose.

I live in constant hope that one day what’s in my head will make it out into the world in proper oral form, and also that what’s in my head increases, but for now I will have to make do with hand signals and pointing.
What I will say though is that the stereotype of the haughty French person who doesn’t like the English language has not been my experience. Everyone, everyone, has gone out of their way to make me feel welcome and to help me out, and I am eternally grateful, if constantly guilty. I’ve had so much support and assistance that I feel compelled to learn French quicker, to try harder, to be the best damn language assistant the world has ever seen!! 

And of course I will be.

So to sum up: the overall mood is a good one, despite their being constant peaks and troughs, multiple times a day, where I think “Gah no don’t make me do that!” but I smile on the outside and metaphorically get the sand out my vagina on the inside, and then I do it and it’s either bad or it’s good but it actually doesn’t matter because at least it’s done. 

Et voila! I managed to sum up my experiences without going into every boring detail and without taking up 10,000 words!

Special shout out to Anna, Nicole, Rory and all the other assistants I’ve met this week, et bon chance!
Over and out,
Love love love
Bisous!
Naomi

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